XF relationship
I got this doubt.
When u got a bf/gf from another faction, for some are not bad, for others is the worst of the world.
I would like to have an idea what the people think.
I mean. I love ingress because is a social game. I've met a lot of awesome people (both factions) but in this matter it seems is more complicated.
Some are more opened... Others more radicals.
This is based of my own past experience, but im curious what others think.
Thanks 😊
4
Comments
So XF relationships depend on the level of activity between parties of that relationship and the general communities involved. If neither are super involved, I feel like there is not much to worry about. Likewise, if a portion of that relationship (in case you're dealing with a polyamourous XF relationship) is all on one faction, it is also not a problem.
The problem comes down to trust in the individual agents involved. Can we trust so and so with field ops or intel, farm times, etc.
My gf doesn't play Ingress, but we're opposite factions on World of Warcraft and we get along fine. It seems... unlikely... that people in general get any crazier about Ingress than they do about WoW. On the other hand, this is the sort of thing that is ALWAYS going to depend on the specific two people. Also, you may have trouble getting a security clearance from your local faction community if you're dating someone from the other faction.
TL;DR: it's totally possible, but it depends on the relationship, and other people might not understand.
XF relationships are nothing but a good thing if they are not win trading like a couple of fools with foam bats high on PCP.
faction toxicity is often out of control in a lot of places. the more cross faction love i see the better. this is a game. we should be striving for honorable competitive play... not stalking, name calling, harrasing BS.
lead by example. Have Teal babies.
Remember that players across factions are no different than playing a game with someone across the table from you. It's alright to engage in friendly competition with someone you like or love. Heck, several friends of mine are ENL players, and I'm RES. In person, I'm kind, but in the game, I'm relentless. ;)
Xf relationships are ok.
Wintrading is not on the Tos any more but I still think you could have xf friends but not do wintrading. It takes the fun out of the game.
Unless it's sanctioned win-trading?
I love the idea of cross-faction stuff going on. Everyone is out to play, to have fun and eventually to meet other players, maybe make many friends. Be it for win-trading, though as Dgaleano said it would suck the fun out of things, or just general stuff that slips my mind right now.
The many cross-faction projects I've seen thus far are AMAZING, and honestly the more we all work together, the more
Its pretty bad where I play at, although the general surrounding area has an okay xfac relationship. One opposing faction agents in particular is extremely toxic. He got comm banned multiple times before and now he's using portal edits to put in toxic and VERY inappropriate remarks about our agents.
We're surprised he's just not straight up banned despite our countless reports.
My fiancé and I began dating as opposite-faction agents. We were both fairly aggressive L16 agents at the time and that was part of what attracted us to each other. For about 6 months we got by as an xfac couple, but as time went on it became more and more apparent that one of us was going to have to flip. When we went to a new place we both wanted to capture portals but if we did it would be win-trading so usually one of us just hacked while the other was active. When one of us fielded the other couldn't really help or interfere, which was less than fun. We would occasionally shown up quietly at each other's builds or events and there were always some people who found this uncomfortable. We traveled to 2 anomalies as an xfac couple and there were always questions about loyalty. Ultimately, he made the decision to flip, and we've been much happier since.
Everyone has a different experience, but in mine it's too hard to keep playing on opposite factions.
I think I'm friends with as many res on social media as enl now that I think about it. I love most of the local players here, res or enl. Of course there's going to be bad apples on both sides though.
I’ve found xfac dating to be great. Preferable, really. But you know what they say. You’ve got to **** a lot of frogs.
In my case i must **** a lot of smurfs 😂
Just kidding. Hahaah
I wish people were more love and less war (outside ingress) ❤❤❤
I've dated the opposite faction and people's response to this is all over the place. In my experience, people in urban areas are more tolerant than rural (there are definitely exceptions though), and older players tend to be less attached and not freaked out by it. Then there at others that are just straight up racist about it. Real life is always more important, and it's important to realize that anybody micromanaging your behavior is just a community control freak that needs to lay off. Have integrity,
I've dated the opposite faction and people's response to this is all over the place. In my experience, people in urban areas are more tolerant than rural (there are definitely exceptions though), and older players tend to be less attached and not freaked out by it. Then there are others that are just straight up descriminatory. Real life is always more important, and it's important to realize that anybody micromanaging your behavior is just a community control freak that needs to lay off. Be your word and honor people's expectation that you protect your faction regarding opsec issues.
I think that living together with another faction player when both are very active players would be almost impossible. At least one of them would have to become no more than a casual player who doesn't get involved in serious stuff anymore. I mean, if you see your partner going somewhere in the middle of the night, what would you think? Right, they're going to do some big op. If you don't warn your faction about it, that would certainly feel bad and can raise trust questions. If you do, your partner's team would fail and everyone would think that this is because of you both live together and know too much.
All the other forms of xf relationships are ok for me :)
I have family members that aren't on my team. And, I have a friend that has dated someone from the other team. Tensions can be high and unwanted stress can weigh down the relationship.
Essay incoming because I have a lot of thoughts on this.
My friend struggled with high tensions whenever she completed an in-game action that was disastrous for her bf's team. He considered some of her more aggressive game play tactics as personal attacks, especially if they just had an argument. It was tough to watch. They tried to give each other one day a week to field without being spied, or reported on. They tried leaving their community chats. They even tried an Ingress break which was quite successful for about a year. But, my friend lost a large part of her life for it and eventually wanted to rejoin her social groups. I am not sure how much Ingress amplified their relationship problems, or if it was simply an indicator of a deeper issue. But, I have also experienced this opposite faction tension with my family, and we're pretty tight.
My loyalties for a short period of time were in doubt because of my parent's game play, threatening my access to high security operations and environments. When my family traveled in groups without me, I was in a position where I had to clear them of cheating allegations because they shared similar IGN's. For the first time, my honesty was in question.
When I'd call my family to ask how their day was, they'd have to lie to me... usually saying something like, "oh... you know, just enjoying the countryside today. Thought we'd go for a drive for no reason." This was to protect some assignment they'd been given. The lying made things awkward between us.
Whenever I was late for something, I'd be accused of playing Ingress. Being a little late was never an issue before, if I called. But, it was an issue if I was late because I was supporting the "other" team.
When we'd go on long trips, we'd have to take turns as to who would get to play, leaving the other out, just to avoid win-trading. This meant half the family was having fun getting uniques, while the other had to find their own thing to do, alone. It divided us when we were supposed to be enjoying each other's company with hobbies and common interest.
Sometimes it was silly. If we were in a car together and I got out my phone, they'd jump on me, shouting, "Check her phone! She's killing our portals, isn't she?" They'd panic and get out theirs to battle me when all I was doing was checking my email. Or, if we were on a van tour we'd jump out and race each other for a unique capture, tripping and screaming things like, "You selfish brat! I'm sitting in the front seat from now on! You only chose to sit there for the captures."
Sometimes it's sad. My family were in town and didn't come to a 350+ person event I'd planned because they didn't want to make things awkward for me. It didn't matter how much I insisted I wanted them there, having fun with everyone else, getting joy from something I'd created. But, they refused, just because they're not on my team, even though they had donated a ton of time and money making my team leads personalized swag in support of the event.
We are all playing the same game. We are all agents. I wish we treated each other like people first, faction second.
Now that we live in the same state, my mother desperately wants to play with her daughter again. I have never minded our faction differences. But, it has never sat well with her. She doesn't want to avoid sharing hotel rooms, doesn't want to keep secrets about where she's going and where she's been, and wants to be able to talk freely without fear of exposing strategy.
@vidicon Didn't know that! Or, forgot. I love that your passionate game play united you two.
I don't think Xfac couples can really work long term. If they are both lone wolfs then it isn't as important other than win trading for captures (which Niantic have now removed from the ToS) but will be an issue if one or both parties are active in their communities.
I would feel uncomfortable knowing that whenever we have a farm or an op, the other team could know about it. On the other hand it would be annoying when the other team have a farm/op and one of the xfac couple on my team knew about it but said nothing.
If you are an Xfac couple you probably can't do nothing right regarding 1) not telling your team of the other factions plans and 2) telling your team of the other factions plans.
i only talk to the enemy through xmp. unless at anomaly, then im trying to flip every competent smurf i see.
A good friend of mine has been dating someone in the Resistance for roughly 3-4 years, and they're about to get married.
Obviously there are tensions, but he was on the north anchor for a field that covered 1/6th - 1/7th CONUS.
His story: "I'm going ice fishing".
I dated a frog for awhile. We had a strict agreement that we would tell each other what we were up to if there was an op or a farm going down, but we couldn't tell our respective teams, it had to be kept within our relationship. Also no win-trading, if we were together we would decide who was firing and capping for the day/event/whatever, and the other could only hack. It worked pretty well, and our respective local teams were cool with it. He eventually flipped to Resistance though about a year into our relationship, mostly cause an anomaly was coming up locally and it was just easier for us to be on the same team.
@ModularModular what was the point of telling each other about an op or farm?
@jplolo we mostly did it to prevent awkwardness and mistrust in our relationship, like if one of us was sneaking out in the middle of the night that could be perceived as something that it wasn't. So when we first started dating we agreed to these rules, that it was ok to just tell the other person what we were up to, and that person couldn't tell their faction.
This is so sad. I was really committed to keeping each factions information within that particular faction. So, I knew about RES plans and didn't tell ENL because my relationship was treated like a truce. My home team and faction leaders were supportive, but my team in his area were NOT. I was bullied while being EXTREMELY trusted by the rest of my faction outside that area, and I stopped playing Ingress in his area after 3 months. I did not want to be seen or remembered by them. After time, the relationship didn't work out for other reasons, but I still refuse to play there. That was two years ago and I don't miss it... That's for sure. *sigh*
Enemy in game, friends out of game!
I think xfac relationships could work on the premise of trust. Tell your partner everything. Plans for ops, anomalies, and agree that neither will use information gained from the relationship to thwart those plans. Better, imo, than having to keep secrets and possibly have to lie about something so you don't give something away. No win trading. No helping other faction by clearing blockers or setting tripwires.
At some point, I think it's just natural for partners to want to Ingress together though, and other Agents are going to consider that when involving xfac couples. It's the nature of the beast.
On a partner level yeah, but what happens when you are heading to throw a field for an op and the member of the other team is there by coincidence? You now have to convince your faction that your partner didn't say anything. This can be applied to farms and all sorts, even just daily play. There will always be one person who has an issue with it on both factions, and that's all it takes.
Yes. But other faction is not blind. They can notice that something is going on. I dont think that is fault of a person with a bf/gf from other faction.
People is very radical sometimes. It seems that we must love our colours (blue or green) over the persons. "Youre blue/green. I wont talk to you".
I was blue in the past and ive met awesome green players. And now im green and got great blue friends.
I love ingress because I love the social part of this game. Meeting people. Going to have a coffee or a beer. And who knows what else might happens? 😉